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#1 2/14/2009 4:28 am

p.buccino
Member
From: KingdomKome
Registered: 12/11/2008
Posts: 1007

Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

Music/ videos

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xoiw9kcHPaQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mpHLEm9-0bg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l12Csc_lW0Q

Jokes: i only know one -.-

Pinoshio's nose is long! almost as long at his dong! xD


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#2 2/14/2009 6:30 pm

guestforeverx
Member
From: Killing the horde in Gears 3
Registered: 7/23/2008
Posts: 352
Website

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

i heard this joke on tv

what is cheese that doesn't belong to you ?

nacho cheese


http://e.imagehost.org/0963/X.gifhttp://www.userbars.com/79556/515140/194-9317-3060r.jpg
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#3 2/14/2009 7:17 pm

AbsoluteSilence
Member
Registered: 12/18/2008
Posts: 3839

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

I have a joke.

I'm a passivist and if you don't become one, I'll personally kick your ass....

In a game of Wii Tennis!


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#4 2/14/2009 11:37 pm

p.buccino
Member
From: KingdomKome
Registered: 12/11/2008
Posts: 1007

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

lol..... yea wii sports is stupid, i think most video games like that are
playing videogame football?- why cant u play real soccer?
guitar hero and rockband? - god dmanit get a real guitar! and a life lol


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#5 2/15/2009 9:34 pm

Babadingldoo
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From: My mom. Oh wait, nvm.
Registered: 6/30/2008
Posts: 2799
Website

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

http://i41.tinypic.com/14snrz5.png


http://internetometer.com/image/2368.png

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#6 2/16/2009 7:04 pm

primary foe
Member
From: Connecticut
Registered: 6/18/2008
Posts: 391

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

This is pretty funny if you start at the beginning:

http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/6/6d/Worldwar2RTS.gif


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#7 2/16/2009 7:10 pm

AbsoluteSilence
Member
Registered: 12/18/2008
Posts: 3839

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

Primary, that is some focking funny sh1t.


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#8 4/22/2009 8:50 pm

nachoking19961
Banned
From: NJ
Registered: 4/9/2009
Posts: 38

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

guestforeverx wrote:

i heard this joke on tv

what is cheese that doesn't belong to you ?

nacho cheese

thats me lol


"Stare at he statues.....don't blink!........just don't blink!......"===Quote from The Doctor

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#9 4/22/2009 11:47 pm

carcrazcid
Member
From: California
Registered: 12/23/2008
Posts: 1654

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

lol @ absos first post on here
lol @ baba ( i actually get it )
lol @ foe

i kno a joke...


What do you get when you put money in the freezer?

Cold Hard Cash.


I say 2+2=3

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#10 4/23/2009 12:01 am

AbsoluteSilence
Member
Registered: 12/18/2008
Posts: 3839

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

I have a bit racist one, but whatever.

What do you call three white guys pushing a car up a hill?
White power.
What do you call three black guys pushing a car up a hill?
Black power.
What do you call three Mexican guys pushing a car up a hill?
Grand Theft Auto.

Sorry to anyone who got offended.

Last edited by AbsoluteSilence (4/23/2009 7:03 pm)


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#11 4/23/2009 1:02 am

Shadowken42
Member
From: New York
Registered: 6/19/2008
Posts: 4485
Website

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."



EDIT another one:




One day little Tommy was walking with an older neighborhood kid named Billy Bob and he got curious.

“Billy Bob,” Tommy asked, “How come everyone calls you by your first name and your middle name instead of just Billy?”

“Well,” Billy Bob answered, “When I was little like you, I used to get in trouble a lot, and when I did my mom always called me by both names. I guess after a while, it just stuck.”

“Oh no!” Tommy cried. “I’d better straighten up then!”

“Why’s that?” Billy Bob asked.

“I don’t want to end up being called ‘you little sh#!’ for the rest of my life!”

Last edited by Shadowken42 (4/23/2009 1:13 am)


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#12 4/23/2009 2:08 am

carcrazcid
Member
From: California
Registered: 12/23/2008
Posts: 1654

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

XD ken the first 1 pwns XD and abso that joke is old

Edit: Foe idk if u made that thing or not but get anotha XD

Last edited by carcrazcid (4/23/2009 2:42 am)


I say 2+2=3

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#13 4/23/2009 3:26 am

dipinabs11
Member
From: Dallas
Registered: 12/15/2008
Posts: 314

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

not classic but funny nonetheless:

HOW TO Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With
Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer
At Passing Cars.
See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't DisguiseYour Voice. !

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions,

Switch to Espresso.

5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write ' For Marijuana'

6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.

7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat,with a serious face.

8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

9. Sing Along At The Opera.

10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards theParking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity

14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.


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#14 4/24/2009 1:17 am

carcrazcid
Member
From: California
Registered: 12/23/2008
Posts: 1654

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

xD


I say 2+2=3

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#15 4/24/2009 2:04 pm

Shadowken42
Member
From: New York
Registered: 6/19/2008
Posts: 4485
Website

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing; his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"


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#16 4/24/2009 2:21 pm

xmasidiot
Member
From: anywere n evrywere in NyC
Registered: 9/4/2008
Posts: 103
Website

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

i dont get the last part ken

Last edited by xmasidiot (4/24/2009 2:21 pm)

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#17 4/24/2009 4:22 pm

Shadowken42
Member
From: New York
Registered: 6/19/2008
Posts: 4485
Website

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

First, let's make sure he's dead.(the operator asked him if he was still alive or if he had died.)


There is a silence, then a shot is heard. (this means that the guy shot the dying guy cause he wanted to make sure he was dead. He misunderstood the operator)


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#18 4/24/2009 5:10 pm

Babadingldoo
Member
From: My mom. Oh wait, nvm.
Registered: 6/30/2008
Posts: 2799
Website

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

Don't explain jokes, then they're not funny. Leave the idiots to drown in their stupidity.


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#19 4/24/2009 6:53 pm

Twinfan
Member
From: Gotham
Registered: 11/17/2008
Posts: 6241

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

lol good jokes


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I am no longer an active member of Twboards, but if you need--or want--to talk to me, I have left the option of sending an email available. If you abuse it or spam me or something, I will A) Promptly remove the email option, and B) Hunt you to the ends of the Earth. Choose wisely and I wish you all the best of luck...

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#20 4/26/2009 8:08 pm

primary foe
Member
From: Connecticut
Registered: 6/18/2008
Posts: 391

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures


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#21 4/30/2009 9:17 pm

nachoking19961
Banned
From: NJ
Registered: 4/9/2009
Posts: 38

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

Sorry about the black joke, my friend made it.

What do you call 2 black guys jumping from a building?

Who cares?


How many black ppl does
it take to put on a lightbulb?

3, 1 to get a ladder, 1 to replace the bulb,
and 1 to guard the door for racists.

i made that one please tell
me if it sounds good or too
cruel neutral


"Stare at he statues.....don't blink!........just don't blink!......"===Quote from The Doctor

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#22 4/30/2009 9:49 pm

AbsoluteSilence
Member
Registered: 12/18/2008
Posts: 3839

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

People said there would be a black president when pigs flew, and look, a few months into Obama's presidency, THE SWINE FLU!

Last edited by AbsoluteSilence (5/1/2009 1:33 am)


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#23 4/30/2009 10:14 pm

Twinfan
Member
From: Gotham
Registered: 11/17/2008
Posts: 6241

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

lmao, obama is only 50% black for 1, and another thing was he was raised by his white grandparents, therefore he isnt wat his image reflects


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I am no longer an active member of Twboards, but if you need--or want--to talk to me, I have left the option of sending an email available. If you abuse it or spam me or something, I will A) Promptly remove the email option, and B) Hunt you to the ends of the Earth. Choose wisely and I wish you all the best of luck...

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#24 5/2/2009 12:20 am

Cole Train
Member
From: Why Do You Care, Pedophile?
Registered: 11/14/2008
Posts: 1718

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

Funny real Halo 3 situations:

Team Kills Against Me:

1.  The Perfect Finish to a Kill Streak:  Ended by a douche on my team.  I was running by him to kill somebody else when he switched to a rocket launcher and shot me in mid-air with it.  That launched me on to one of those launcher things that launch you across the field.  While I was flying at top speed, my dead body flew right into a guy and killed him.  I was rewarded a kill from the grave.

2.  BRING IT, BITCH!:  I went through a whole game once in a tank... the same tank the whole time.  I had 20+ spartan laser shots taken at me and I survived them all.  I also had 30+ rockets shot at me.  Oh, the really funny part was the fact I ran over 5 people that game.

3:  Tea Bag Kill Streak:  Try this some time: once you kill somebody on Halo 3, teabag them the whole time until they disappear or, if it's limited lives, the whole match, and see how many people you can kill while doing that.  My current record: 6.

4:  Longest Friggin' Warthog Kill EVER:  I had a full amount of ammo on a rocket launcher and I had a spartan laser.  This stupid warthog was just driving around shooting my teammates, so I decided I have to kill it, so I took out the laser and shot... Each shot only grazed the warthog bastards and each time it would do collateral damage to one of my teammates, killing them.  I ran out of ammo, and took out my rocket launcher.  I took all the shots and missed each one.  I went and got more ammo and I missed.  Finally, I decided to screw aiming and to just shot them randomly.  I ended up killing 5 teammates, 10 enemies, and finally the stupid warthog, by using that strategy.  I was then sniped by one of my own guys and kicked from the game.

I would love to hear about any bull crap moments on any games you've played that are just so stupid you have to giggle a little...


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#25 2/15/2017 9:16 pm

Knifee
New member
Registered: 2/15/2017
Posts: 1

Re: Classic Jokes and music and videos and pictures

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